Sex with disabled people

I have been paralyzed since 1989 . and I still have all the desires that I did before becoming paralyzed. Not being able to satisfy myself and having to rely on others to assist me can be a delicate and uncomfortable ordeal. And not having the motor skills to actually perform masturbation on myself is impossible. And finding a so-called surrogate I have found to be almost impossible.

I have had caregivers that after being with me for a long period of time became somewhat comfortable with that as part of my care. It is a very delicate matter that has to be handled carefully. If I had asked them directly to perform manual masturbation in most cases it would be considered sexual-harassment. And you could lose services from a agency or institution.

But since I am at home and hire my own caregivers through a program set up for people with disabilities to save money by illuminating the nursing agencies I have found that if you build up a good relationship with your caregiver in some cases they will look at it just part of your care and well-being.

I heard a few years ago, carers in Holland have to perform masturbation on their clients. I don't know if this is true or not!?

If your carers are happy doing this, I cant see no problems.

Are your carers female or male?

To answer your question all of my caregivers are females , but I'm only comfortable with one of them that has been with me for quite some time engaging in such matters.

Believe me I would rather find someone to be with as a boyfriend or someone who has mutual needs and would enjoy my company not only sexually . but just to spend quality time with. Which I have found pretty difficult to find someone who is interested in being together as boyfriend and girlfriend or to satisfy each other sexual needs.

I did have a caregiver years ago , that we had a mutual agreement that we could take care of each others sexual needs and keep it as that. She didn't want a relationship other than the time we spent together while she was giving me care and both of us satisfying each others needs.

Loco you said:

\"But since I am at home and hire my own caregivers through a program set up for people with disabilities to save money by illuminating the nursing agencies ......\"

wot iz this program??


xx suzan xx

Loco wrote:

Believe me I would rather find someone to be with as a boyfriend or someone who has mutual needs and would enjoy my company not only sexually . but just to spend quality time with. Which I have found pretty difficult to find someone who is interested in being together as boyfriend and girlfriend or to satisfy each other sexual needs.

Dating is hard for anyone at the best of times but to have a disability is bloody harder - prejudices are just a couple of things that can hold people back from pursuing a relationship. But the internet is breaking down barriers as you can talk online without telling them about your disability. However, this is hard to do without lying to them.

Regarding your carers, are they the same age as you? Are they single or in a relationship?

Susan goes through a place called Center for disability rights. Which enables you to hire your own caregivers , either people you know or people they have on a phone system. Where you can post the position you have open and they can reply

Karl as for the question about the age of my caregivers some are younger and some are older. Age is just a number to me as long as we are both consenting adults.:woohoo:<br><br>Post edited by: Loco, at: 2008/01/04 04:06

That seems a task to find and have willing carers to do that for you

I think society as a whole needs to understand that people with any type of disability or need actually need to 'indulge' in sexual acts and work on their sexuality

I have been lucky enough to find care givers that were compassionate enough to understand what it meant to me as a human being. They helped me with a release but we kept it as professional as possible she stayed dressed we didn't speak as she did it. Basically we treated it like one more part of my care.
It's unfortunate it's not easier to find people like that.

Read this

www.swissinfo.ch/eng/index.html?siteSect=105&sid=1715377

`hi friend me adnan from pakistan and i am also disable i would like a friend ship with u.will u like a freid ship with me

I don't think sex with a disabled person is a matter of \&quot;sexual rights\&quot; there's no such thing...sex is part of being humans so therefore sex for a disabled person is a matter of being R.A.W.: Ready Able Willing..

Dear Sir,
many people discriminate people with disable can not fully satisfy to their sexual satisfaction and regaded as failures in life or a curse iam single and visual impared studying tour guiding and administration in Nairobi Kenya.<br><br>Post edited by: Able_Here_Team, at: 2010/06/02 10:54

I am a disabled gay guy who has been in a wheelchair for the last 10 years.I am getting on towards my 58th birthday, and since being in a wheelchair I have found it very dificult to look for someone else. I have had in the past a lovely boyfriend who moved on, and feel very lost in him going. I often think of a nice sexy guy walking into my life. But feel that I have lost the gift of the gab.I long for it to happen, but feel that guys look at me they are thinking O no a disabled person, sorry could not cope with that:( I like most of you never think about our disabiltys, we are human like everyone else. I can give a lot of loving to the right person, but there is to much stigma going on around us, for people to take notice that we are human :dry: